Monday, August 31, 2015

friendship - a short update

Hey everyone!

I turned 18 about a month ago and just last Saturday did I get the chance to "celebrate" my birthday. I went out to the movies and to get dinner at my favorite restaurant with some of my friends. We had a really nice time but I'm going to admit I was somewhat reluctant to even do something for my birthday, because it seems like I'm slowly repelling social events more and more. It's not that I have anything against the people I hung out with (they're like the nicest bunch I know), but I'm always fearing being rejected up front and finally having to deal with the fact that most people here don't like me. It was interesting how my mom would ask me to invite people she thinks I'm still friends with but that don't even bother to say "hi" to me now. Inviting people is hard for me because I feel like I'm preventing them from going out drinking/smoking weed and that they silently hate me for it. It sounds funny when I write it out but it is so true. I feel like I don't want to bother people with my weird presence and that's why I try to stay away from them. I also kind of think I'm better than everyone else, and that's terrible and all, but I'm sure we all feel like that sometimes. Anyway, I've been writing "poems" about my current "social situation" and I just recently thought about a photography series to go along with them. The photography series will probably be called "Force-feeding" and it'll consist of four pictures representing the values and morals of the society around me. It should be fun.

Polaroids we took on Saturday:

Thanks so much for reading!



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